Thirty Kisses: XS
by Blood Rose Vampiress
Summary: Thirty kisses of Xanxus and Squalo. Ratings go from K to M.
1. First Kiss

**A/N: The first in a series of XS drabbles/ficlets. Enjoy.**

The first time Xanxus ever kissed Squalo he was drunk - not something that makes for the perfect kiss.

It was the day after Squalo first joined Varia when Xanxus ordered him to come to his room through an intercom. And, though it was two in the fucking morning and all Squalo wanted to do was sleep, he reluctantly went, not wanting to get on his new boss's bad side so soon.

When the silverette entered the room and closed the door behind him, he wrinked his nose, the extremely strong smell of alcohol in the air. Terrific, he had an alcoholic for a boss.

"VOOIIII! You called?" The swordsman walked further into the room, wanting to get this over with as soon as possible so he could get to bed. If he didn't do so soon, he would oversleep and miss giving his sword its daily oil bath because he was running late.

"Get over here, scum," Xanxus ordered, beckoning him foreword until Squalo stood right in front of him. Without warning, the Varia boss pulled the silverette down onto his lap.

"VOOIII! Wha-" Squalo was cut off by Xanxus's hard lips on him, kissing him roughly. The swordsman was too stunned to protest as Xanxus gripped his shoulder painfully, slipping his tongue into Squalo's mouth. Squalo had to admit that, besides the strong taste of alcohol, the kiss wasn't all that bad. In fact, Xanxus was a rather good kisser.

Hesitantly, Squalo let their tongues meet, exploring his new boss's mouth. Just as he was really getting into it however, Xanxus pushed him away sharply.

"Remember, you're mine now, scum," the Varia boss growled, glaring at Squalo with hard crimson eyes. "Now go."

Squalo wanted to protest, to curse at him, but something kept him from doing so. Maybe it was the authority Xanxus had over him, or maybe Squalo liked that, just a little. He stood, but before he could take a step, Xanxus grabbed at his short hair, tugging hard.

"VOOIII! What the fuck?" Squalo exclaimed, gripping his head in pain.

"I want it to grow longer quickly," Xanxus stated, letting go. "Got it, trash?" He glared at Squalo with those eyes again, and the silverette felt a shiver go down his spine.

"Yeah, yeah," he muttered, quickly stalking out and shutting the door behind him.

Walking back to his room, he couldn't help but put his fingers to his lips. "...Shitty boss."


	2. Second Kiss

Falling...

Falling...

He had no idea what had hit him as he fell, head first, into the chlorine pool water.

"VOOOIIII! What the hell? he exclaimed, pissed, as he resurfaced, coughing up pool water. Fuck, his eyes, they stung!

Hearing another splash, the swordsman turned, but, because of the water clouding his vision, he couldn't see anything.

Not until a pair of lips had decended upon his, and only then did he get a glimpse of crimson eyes before he was pushed under the water again, the kiss never breaking.

Struggling, he tried to get away, but strong arms held him down, and soon, the tongue pushing its way into his mouth, dominating him, became too much to resist, and, gripping his boss's shoulders, Squalo kissed back vigorously, fingernails digging into the skin.

Not too long later, because of a need for air, the silverette guessed, Xanxus broke away, swimming to the surface, and Squalo followed.

Before the swordsman could say anything, perhaps a 'What the fuck?' or something along those lines, Xanxus was already walking away, back towards the manor, the usual uniform he was wearing soaking wet and dripping everywhere.

Squalo just shook his head as he stared after him, having no idea what was going through the Varia leader's head, and dived under the water again.

He'd completely forgotten the number of laps he was on and would have to start all over again.


	3. Third Kiss

Really, of all things Xanxus expected to find in the morning, _this _was nowhere on his list.

"What the fuck are you doing in my room, trash?" he exclaimed to the silverette who was kneeling on his bed, way too close in his opinion. Squalo was still wearing his pajamas, which made the Varia boss wonder if he was sleepwalking or something. Damn scum! Xanxus glared at him with tired crimson eyes, having just woken up when he felt the bed tip at the new weight.

"Repaying you," the swordsman murmured, a cocky smirk on his face.

Before Xanxus could ask just _what _the shark meant by that, Squalo's lips touched his, first a bit hesitant, then harder.

Xanxus couldn't help but wonder how the silverette's lips could be so soft, as they were each time they connected with his own. Did he use chapstick or something? Maybe he should start using some... Lost in the thought, he completely forgot about pulling away.

Before he knew it (and before he could give his consent), Squalo's tongue had entered his mouth. Still a bit flustered and blinking sleepily at the other, he faught for dominance the best he could, tugging hard at the shark's long silver hair. Hair that would continue to grow longer just for _him_.

As they broke for air, Xanxus's mouth turned up in a pleased smirk at the sight of Squalo, panting heavily, face flushed. It was obvious he still wasn't used to kissing for so long. Well he should damn well _get _used to it!

The silverette's nightshirt fell off his shoulders somewhat, revealing smooth, pale skin.

Skin Xanxus just couldn't _wait _to mark.

**A/N: And there was one where Squalo kissed Xanxus first. Hope you enjoyed it! (:**


	4. Fourth Kiss

This wasn't good. Not at all. Squalo didn't like the look Xanxus was giving him one bit as he sat awkwardly at his boss's right side during breakfast.

The looks had started as soon as the swordsman had sat down, and they'd gotten so intense that Squalo could barely eat his scrambled eggs anymore. What the hell did Xanxus _want_?

"Ushishishi, why you so quiet, sharky?" came Belphegor's extremely annoying voice from the other side of the table. "Usually you're screaming everyone's ears off about something or other by now. Maybe Lussuria poisoned your eggs?"

There was an indignant squack from the far end of the table and Squalo sighed. Bel obviously hadn't noticed the looks. Luckily. God knows how much the damned brat would tease him if he did.

Unfortunately his relief didn't last long. Without warning, the table jolted, sending Squalo's plate right into his lap. Face down. _Fuck_, he had just washed these pants! Turning to see the cause of this mess, he saw Xanxus, who now stood, still staring at him with that intensely seductive look from before.

And now all the rest of the Varia were staring too, silent. Squalo felt his face go red, but before he could scream at everyone to stop, he was gripped by the hair, a pair of lips descending on his own, and kissed harshly.

In front of everyone.

Squalo could hear Bel's cat-calls and Lussuria's giggling, and his face promptly began to resemble a tomato.

After a few seconds, Xanxus let go and shoved him backwards, sending him toppling back into his chair again. "Remember who you belong to, trash," came his rough voice as he headed out of the room, leaving Squalo utterly humiliated.

And somehow eggs had gotten in his hair.


	5. Fifth Kiss

**A/N:** I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while, my writing spirit wasn't very high. The content here is rated M, having a nondescriptive sex scene. Enjoy.

**x x x**

Heavy panting filled the quiet night, evaporating into cool air.

A tongue ran over sweat soaked skin, lapping softly.

Hair the color of silver moonlight was stroked, then tugged harshly, drawing a soft gasp from the lips of its owner.

"You like this, don't you?" came a voice from above, pitch almost reaching a growl as slick bodies moved together at a quicker pace.

A low whine was the only answer, hands gripping at strands of lush grass below.

Bodies tensed, lips connecting harshly, silencing wanton moans that threatened to escape.

Silver strands were caressed, almost tenderly as fleeting gazes met, then faded, heavy lids closing.

All was still except for slowly rising chests and the ruffle of green grass from quiet breathing.

And an albino skunk.


	6. Sixth Kiss

**A/N:** Yay, my writer's block is somewhat gone, at least for today~

**Disclaimer: **I don't own KHR or any of the characters in it, which is pretty obvious because Squalo and Xanxus haven't broken the bed fucking yet.

**Rating:** K+ for language.

_**Sixth Kiss**_

Alright, why the fuck was Xanxus hopping around the manor wearing _bunny _ears? It didn't take a genius to figure out something was very, _very _wrong. Squalo considered stepping back into his office, locking the door, and not coming out for 23 days, but then someone would probably eat all the oreo ice cream, and he sure as hell couldn't let _that _happen. Bravely, the swordsman took a tentative step out the door, then another.

Crap. Spotted.

His boss took no time in hopping over to him, bunny ears and all. And _fuck_, the smell of alcohol was almost overbearing.

Now, Xanxus had done some pretty crazy things when he was drunk, including the time he tried to make a penguin do the laundry (unsuccessful), but this was definitely the worst.

Shaking his head, the silverette sighed and looked warily at his boss. "Look, Xanxus," he tried, speaking in a voice one would use when trying to get a young child to understand that no, Barney was not going to be hiding under their bed at night waiting to do very disturbing things, because there was no way Barney could possibly fit under the bed. "You should go back to your room and get some sleep."

_Staaaaare_.

Okay, voice not working.

"Vooooiiiiii," Squalo grunted, rubbing his temples. He was going to get a permanent migraine from all of this shit. He wished Xanxus would just go back to being an angry drunk instead of a weird one, even though that meant three showers a day to wash the alcohol out of his hair.

"Boss, seriously, you need-"

Before the sentence could be finished, a surprised swordsman found himself pushed roughly against the wall, warm lips descending upon his. The kiss reeked of alcohol and Squalo tried unsuccessfully to pull back. Apparently walls were very, very sturdy.

Three agonizing minutes later, Xanxus finally broke away, leaving his second-in-command to gasp repeatedly and wish alcohol had never, ever been invented.

Dazed, Squalo didn't even give a damn what his boss did anymore, as long as he was far away from him. His clothes seriously stunk. He shook his head, watching Xanxus's white tail bob as he hopped away. He was so going to sue all alcohol companies.


End file.
